Uncultured Hybrid

"You shouldn't be looking for love when you are single. Rather use the time to work on yourself and grow as an individual." For the past three years, I have heard this question so many times that I no longer have an answer to it. In the beginning, I would tell people that I had just gotten out of a serious long term relationship and I needed time to heal and recover (You can read about this on my blog Recovery). Once I had recovered I realised that I really just didn't want to be in a relationship but it just seemed like guys were not on the same page as me. It seemed like they were just flocking to "get me off the market". What many of these guys didn't know was that I was super insecure and felt that I did not deserve to be loved.  For those of you who have read some of my other blogs, you will know how I struggled with my self-esteem. I felt so worthless for so many years that I really believed that nobody will ever love/ like me. So when I eventually...

Heaven and earth will pass away, but My words shall not pass away. But of that day and hour no one knows, not even the angels of heaven, nor the Son, but the Father alone. Matthew 24:35-36 I know a lot of people look at the world around them and feel disheartened because there is so much chaos. There are people dying of the pandemic and other illnesses. There are war outbreaks between many nations.   People are hungry, living in poverty and afflicted with other calamities. We see natural disasters, global warming and mysterious things happening in our communities.   The love among people has gone cold. We see this because people do not wear masks to protect themselves and others from Covid-19. People destroy businesses and steal from each other. People kill and harm their neighbours for minor things. We see people taking temporary action that will have a long term effect on people’s jobs and the economy.   I understand when people who don’t know Christ panic and try to fi...

"In the end, we only regret the chances we didn't take." Have you ever felt like you are stuck in one place and that your life is going nowhere? That is exactly how I felt for the better part of 2020 and the first half of 2021. Sometimes we get stuck in relationships, jobs and other situations because we have become comfortable and complacent. We become blinded by the fact that this thing keeping us stuck is fulfilling a purpose in our lives. Our sight becomes so blurry that we cease to see anything beyond the relationship, job or situation. We even give up on our dreams and plans.  In December 2019, I finally landed a job as an online English teacher after years of struggling to find a job. I was ecstatic and really grateful to finally start my journey to financial freedom. In the beginning, I loved the job and really put my best effort into ensuring that my students were happy when they left the lesson. I quickly learned that no matter how much effort you put into the w...

Have you ever stopped to think about what it means to be chosen? At birth, women have 1 million eggs. At puberty about 300 000 and in her lifetime 300 - 400 of those eggs are ovulated. The rest go to waste with every menstrual cycle. Man produce millions of sperm cells in their lifetime. How else would you be if you had the right sperm cell and egg not been specifically chosen to meet at the specific time they met to make you? I mean not every egg and sperm will produce the same human and we see this in siblings with the same parents. You may share a DNA and have some similar features but you will never look the same. It had to be the work of someone who had a purpose specifically for you to ensure that you were created. The thought 'What does it mean to be chosen' came to my mind as I was doing my devotion and I bumped upon the verse John 15:16 "Ye have not chosen me, but I have chosen you, and ordained you, that ye should go and bring forth fruit, and that your fru...

"I can't move! I can't sit up! I can't walk!" "Just try, keep trying. I know you can do it" "I can't! It's too painful!" Just like that, I had accepted my fate and gave up on my right leg as it had given up on me. This was not the first time I gave up on something in life. So many times when I found myself in a difficult situation my solution was wanting to die. I had convinced myself that the dead are better off and that I would be better off dead.  According to the dictionary on google the 'easy way out' means 'extricating oneself from a difficult situation by choosing the simplest rather than the most honourable course of action.' In simple words, it means the easiest but not the best way of doing something, especially a way that does not involve much effort. We have all taken the easy way out at least once in our lives and there is no shame in that because some of live challenges can really take a toll on...

Imagine that you are driving at full speed but no matter how fast you go you seem to be in the same place. 2020 was a year that put all our lives into perspective.  Towards the end of 2020 I read a book entitled The Power of Your Subconscious Mind. I learned a lot from reading that book and I decided to put some of those things into practice.  The fourth of January 2021 I walked into my office, where I work as an online English teacher in my little cubicle, and the first thing my colleagues asked me is if I had a date after work because I was looking smart and fine. Now let me give you the full story. Since I started working at this company in 2019 my dress code was jeans or pants and hoodies. It was only natural for them to assume that I was dressed up for a special occasion.  My change of wardrobe was constant so one of my friends eventually asked me why I changed my dress code. So I told her I was dressing for my future job. I don't know what that job is bu...