What's Your Price?

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"You would not undersell a product or service you really like. So why do you undersell yourself?"

Have you ever walked into a store, saw something you liked, looked at the price and walked away?

Yeah me too. I literally walk into a store, see something and say "This is so nice." When I look at the price I say "Nevermind, it's not so nice anymore." and walk away. Also I hate window shopping. I don't understand the purpose of looking at things I can't afford. It makes me feel miserable but it has been said to be therapeutic for some people. 

Anyways, the fact that I walked away because I can't afford the product does not decrease the cost nor the quality of the product. So often when people walk away from us or when the people we care about don't care about us we feel like we have lost our value. The worst is when you find out that the person you like doesn't like you back. These things make us think less of ourselves. We start telling ourselves that we are not good enough. We diminish our worth and quality. We even lower our standards.

Not all clothes that are in stores are there for everybody. As much as they come in different sizes not everything will suit me. The same can be said about us. You can be many people's cup of tea but some people may only like coffee so you have no business being in their cup.

So many times we under value and undersell ourselves. We don't believe in our capabilities, we don't go for what we deserve because we don't think we actually deserve it. We are so used to being rejected that we think it is suspicious when someone accepts us. We simply self-sabotage.

I realised that I so often undersell myself. I mean I am confident in my abilities but I don't think they are good enough. I always think that other people are better than me. Here are some things that people around me usually praise me for:
* My cooking
* Creativity
* Photography
* Kindness
* Work ethics
* Character
There is so much more that people usually compliment me for. I am not blowing my own horn 😂.

As much as I know the compliments are not just flattery, somewhere deep down I still undersell myself and self-sabotage. So many of us undersell ourselves because we compare ourselves to people who have more experience than us. We believe that we are good but so and so is so much better. 

Two months ago I was talking to my friend Jayne. I was telling her about this other friend of mine whose photos are amazing. She asked me "Is he as good as you?" I said "Oh no, he is so much better than me." Jayne was like "Erica your photos are so amazing." I still think I could be better. I remember people would tell me that I should be charging them for my services. I would always say "No it's okay because I think that I am not that great of a photographer. There are people who are much better than me."

Just recently I was speaking to my friend Aubrey and he just asked me, "Why are you still single?" I literally said to him "I am not good enough to be anybody's girlfriend. I don't have time, I don't have patience and besides nobody wants me." Obviously he was shocked because he always tells me that I am wife material. He said, "I am so confused but at the same time I think those are just excuses you are making for yourself. You are focused on something else right now." There are many reasons why I am single and sometimes I really do feel like I am not good enough for someone. Other times I think I am too good 😂 yep I am conflicting. This is why I am not ready. 

My blogs usually end in advice or comforting words but this is a battle that I have not managed to figure out yet. So if you have any suggestions on how I can stop underselling myself and constantly give myself the value I deserve I am all ears. I guess the lesson is that I am not perfect, as much as I have overcome many obstacles and learned many lessons I am still on this journey to becoming the best version of me. 

Once you have started the journey it is easy to keep going. Take the first step to becoming the best version of you. Love you, appreciate you and acknowledge your value.

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