The Scale

"Yes, I am naturally skinny. No, you don't need to tell me that I need to eat more. Also, don't ask if I have an eating disorder!"

Many people like me struggle with insecurities because of our weight… Despite how much we eat our fast metabolism prevents us from gaining weight. Many people assume that we are okay with that because losing weight is what the majority of people in the world want. Without realizing it people make us more insecure when they comment on how skinny we are or it’s unfair that they are trying to lose weight we just don’t put on a kilo… 

What people don’t realize is that as much as you don’t like being cautious of your extra kilos, we don’t like being cautious of the kilos we struggle to gain. So many people have told me that being skinny is not a struggle, yes that may not be our struggle, the real struggle is trying to gain weight and being unable to. It is the same as you trying to lose weight and being unable to. What frustrates me the most is when people tell me don’t worry when you have babies you will put on weight… Firstly who told you I want children? Secondly why does having babies seem to be the only solution to my weight gain (or lack thereof) problem?  Thirdly why does my weight have to depend on another human being? Lastly, who said I want to wait, why isn’t gaining weight as urgent as losing?

For many years I have complained about the fact that there are so many solutions, diets, teas, etc. to lose weight but it seems that nobody is focusing on those who struggle to gain. This insecurity deprives me of doing so many things that I would love to do. For example, I don’t join the gym because I am afraid that I might just lose more then I am gaining (it will take longer for me to see results). I don’t wear certain clothes because it just doesn’t look good on me (they make me look like an ironing board or a scarecrow). Many skinny people want to actually be able to easily put on weight. Often people say to me “You must eat!!!”, well that’s usually before they see me eat. After they see me eat they say “It’s unfair, how can you eat so much and not put on any weight?” I eat that much in an attempt to gain something. Maybe we don’t voice out our insecurities as much as people who want to lose weight do but we shouldn’t have to. We should be allowed to struggle with our weight without every second person having something to say about it.

When I joined the gym late last year (2018) the personal trainer told me that I should be eating everything that other people avoid or that I should supplement. Not being able to gain weight should not be an excuse to fill your body with trash because we may not be retaining fat but we are still at risk of being affected by heart disease, cholesterol, high blood pressure, and other health-related issues. So I am still very cautious about what I eat. What people need to be aware of is that we really try to eat, take multivitamins or supplements. Also being skinny doesn’t automatically mean that you have an eating disorder. Many of us are healthy eaters and really have a passionate relationship with food (we are foodies). We also need to take into consideration that for some of us it is in the genes a no matter how many children we bring into this world we will always be skinny (slender).

Right now I am preaching to myself because although we may want to gain weight we may have to learn to accept our bodies the way they are. This goes for people with fuller figures as well. It’s like that saying ‘Your scraps may be someone’s treasure!’ You may be unhappy with your slender body, while someone else is unhappy with the body that you want. If we could just swap bodies as we pleased, I am sure we would have swapped as much as we change our underwear (some people don’t change clothes often)! Anyway, I still need to work on accepting my body as I am persistent on the weight journey… I will just have to accept it someday when I realize that I can’t change. If you really can’t accept it, get help… I am sure someone has some solution for whatever needs you have for your body, also remember that not everything works for everybody! We are different people and we react differently to different things. As we are on this journey to change or improve ourselves may we keep in mind that what is important is within. Your organs are of utmost importance, do what you need without putting them in danger. Also whoever you are on the inside, that’s what matters. You may have the ‘perfect body’ but have the darkest heart and you will end up unhappy. Kindness, humility, honesty, integrity radiate brighter that a pretty/handsome face!

Let’s learn to accept each other and not poke other people’s insecurities. Let’s avoid reminding people of the things they want to change and remind them of all the things that make the perfect in their imperfect way.