Embrace Your Flaws

Like this drawing, our flaws often leave us feeling incomplete and worthless. A flaw can be anything ranging from your figure, personality, scars or anything that you do not like about yourself. Some time ago I was speaking to a friend and he was mentioning how people never post their flaws on social media. It's true that social media has made us superficial and seeking for the perfect look. Very few people post the picture of their double chin, their cellulite or anything that will not get as many likes as they want.

Unfortunately, we have become people who are ashamed of a part of our lives that makes us who we are. No human is made up of life without ups and downs. Imagine riding a roller coaster 🎢 that just went on a straight line. Would you enjoy your ride? Not at all, the joy in the roller coaster is the rush you get when going up and all the screaming you do when you go down. All those ups and downs make you stronger and ready for your next ride. The fear you had of the unknown disappears because you now know that you will come out alive. The same goes with the flaws we have, not everybody can do everything but it's exactly what you can't do or what you don't have that makes you who you are.

I have many talents and my friends often compliment me for being so talented but there are many things that I cannot do. For many years I avoided being put in situations where I would have to do something that I knew I was incapable of doing. That is just one problem of being a perfectionist - if you can't do it, avoid it. But after having a conversation with my friend I took some time to think about how to encourage people to embrace their flaws. The best I could come up with was learning to embrace my flaws first. Below are a few flaws that I am working on embracing:

1. The scar.

I have a scar on my belly that I have been very ashamed of for a very long time. For so many years I heard people tell me how I have a beautiful body for bikinis but I just could never wear a bikini because I had so much to hide. When I realized that I was hiding something that showed that I was a survivor, I just had to share it with the world. I am no longer ashamed of my scar and I am always excited to tell the story of how I almost died (I will share this on another blog post, so stay tuned).

2. Singing.

Everybody that knows me knows that singing is not my forte but I really love doing it. Although I would always catch myself singing in the shower, in my room and recording voice notes on my phone, I would never do it in public. I wouldn't even sing at church nor join a choir. I just couldn't have people know that there is something that I am not good at. Recently I started singing really low while I am shopping and I would keep quiet whenever I saw someone getting too close. There were a few times where I would not realize that someone is coming and then I would just hear them say "You have a beautiful voice". You will understand why I was always shocked to hear that if you ever get the chance to hear me sing. Without realizing I started singing along to music I like in public without worrying about how terrible I sound. A friend was actually shocked and asked me "Since when do you sing along in public." Well since I accepted that I cannot sing and understand that that shouldn't stop me from doing it.

3. Glasses.

Many people find it fashionable to wear glasses and it looks really good but when you need the glasses it is really not fashionable when it doesn't match your outfit. I've hated having to wear glasses since the first day I had to wear them. They start feeling heavy for me when I wear them the whole day, the worst though is when you are using them in bed and you fall asleep with them on. When you wear glasses people always have a joke about it. Someone once told me that my glasses were as thick as the bottom of a glass coca-cola bottle. I actually found that really funny 😂. I had to learn to embrace my need and choose glasses that complimented my face.

4. Perfectionist Control Freak.

The problem with this flaw is that things are only perfect when they are done my way. I always seem to find something wrong when people don't do things the way I do them. This flaw has helped me to develop leadership skills. Whenever I had to do teamwork I would try to be the team leader so I could have some control of how things are done. Leadership positions have helped me to dilute my perfectionism and my need for control. By being a leader I learned that there are different ways to get things done and that other people's ways also work. I am still working on this flaw because it really isn't easy to give up control 😩.

5. Competitiveness.

I am a very competitive person that always strives for excellence. In my competitiveness and strive for excellence, I never want to lose. I sometimes get so competitive that I forget about friendship and having fun. I remember some time ago I was playing table tennis with someone and I was winning. I was on a roll until a friend of mine decided to be funny by taking the ball and hiding it. I got so mad that I almost hit him with the racket. When I realized how angry I was and that my reaction was unnecessary I apologized. Being competitive is good but don't forget to have fun in the process. These days I try to focus on having fun rather than winning and if I can't do that I rather stay away from the competition.

6. Body

I really am not satisfied with my body and weight. I would love to weigh more and look a bit fuller. Every time I catch myself unconsciously complaining about my body I remind myself that I was wonderfully and perfectly made. If I am not going to make any changes to get the body I want then I should learn to love the body I have.

I have many other flaws and we all have endless lists of things we dislike about ourselves. If you learn to embrace your flaws and accept yourself for who you are other people will have no choice but to accept you as well. You and your life are a roller coaster, you are the full package. Your flaws, imperfections, incompleteness and everything else make up your whole being. I wouldn't be me without all these flaws. So brace yourself and teach them to love you just the way you are.